The world is your oyster...

If the world is your oyster, what happens if you really don't like shellfish? What happens if you find a pearl? Does anyone even care.

Probably not.

I have decided that if by the end of October I haven't had a positive reply or any interest on the dating website I will delete my profile and pack it in. Seriously, it is damn annoying. How is it that women seem to like me, find me approachable and friendly, someone they can rely on, yet have no interest in at all when it comes to wanting to date. I know I arent the most stunning guy around, sure I could certainly do to loose some weight but surely these are all superficial qualities or negative attributes, and to quote Transformers, "there's more than meets the eye" with me.

My last girlfriend, said I wasn't exciting enough, perhaps that's my problem. I just aren't enough of a badboy. Literature always has the woman pursing or being pursued by the badboy, the fop, the rogue or playboy type, yet the married couples depicted in text or on screen are always with guys similar to me. its confusing to know that I can be one thing but not the other.

I suffer big time from the "Great guy" syndrome. What I find deeply troubling is when women tell me they think I would be a great dad. I never have, nor at the moment have ever expressed any interest in parenting, and I really don't see how I exhibit any of the attributes that would make a great dad, but... and its a sizeable but... not mine, although I do have a large butt... but I bet the next time a woman says such a thing to me, if I were to be a bit badboy and say, "really, when would you like to start the family?" I bet I would be shunned big time and left there in a proverbial pile of my own defication.

I am what women want, yet don't want. I am Conundrum, the enigma and its a problem that I sure as poo can't solve for myself let alone know how to answer it for women.

So, if a solution doesnt present itself, then I will cease the asking the questions and just put to bed the whole idea of coupling, dating and finding a woman. I shall be a regressive Bachelor, and just keep to myself and plough all my energy into writing.

Speaking of the former girlfriend, though she broke up with me, and we are still friends and have even had some fun time since, I feel its my fault the relationship broke down, and I feel that I may have belittled her womanhood a bit by not fighting to keep the relationship going. We didn't have any conflict to the relationship and I think that might of been part of the problem. In case she is reading this, someone might be, I apologise for not being man enough to take it on the chin and bounce back sooner and try to fight for the relationship. It will be soon nearly a year since we broke up, and there hasnt been many days go by where I haven't thought of offering an apology or even trying to approach you in some kind of way to restart our relationship. Maybe thats also why its so damn hard for me to move into dating other people, well at least part of it.

Well the apology is here, I am sorry that I was too emotionally forward, and I am very sorry that you felt I needed you to reciprocate. I never needed that, or expected it. I shared my feelings because I wanted to let you know how I felt, never because I wanted you to say the same. Personally I think we were just like cats and dogs. I was the dog, loyal, giving and unconditionally available to you, and you were the cat, independent, proud, and only sought affection on your terms. Though cats and dogs can get along together, they often don't, and its not either of their faults, its just the various natures of the beasts.

I just hope that she finds someone that really knows how to keep cats.

As for me, woof woof.